庄子寓言解：东施效颦与邯郸学步

东施效颦与邯郸学步

　　　　古时候有东施学着西施捂胸皱眉却丑态毕露把众人吓坏。

　　　　现如今有大学生学盖茨休学创业提前进入知识经济时代。

　　　　西施他妈语重心长地对小西施说：“女儿，听妈的话，你有心脏病，你一定不要在邻居面前捂着胸口皱着眉毛的，要是让人知道，该找不到婆家了！”

　　　　盖茨他爸循循善诱地对小比尔说：“儿子，听爸的话，学法律，以后动动嘴就来钱，没准儿哪天还能当总统。没听说过摆弄计算器也能赚大钱有出息的！”

　　　　后来，经常在邻居面前捂着胸口皱着眉毛的西施在古典美人排行榜上荣登榜首。

　　　　后来，总是不务正业最后辍学办软件公司的盖茨在世界富豪排行榜上荣登榜首。

　　　　再后来，越王勾践亲临吴国，来到西施曾与夫差“斗智斗勇”的后宫慰问：“我首先谢谢各位佳丽给我与你们会面的机会以及给我谈谈我的国家的机会。”（鼓掌，佳丽们后面的卫兵也跟着鼓起掌来）

　　　　“我们霸业的成功显示了越国美人的力量。但是我们的精神，我们的公众精神，以及相互对彼此的贡献（霸业成功与公众精神之间的贡献）往往并不像我们的美人在古典选美大赛上的成功那么的显而易见。”

　　　　“吴国的竹简上讲到过在越国的后宫里面太监们欺诈和迫害宫女，稍微上了岁数的宫女还会被送去妓院。现在，这两种说法都是不真实的，这种措辞很可能是过去时代遗留的产物，它们是误导，是有害的。事实上越国对于保护后宫佳丽有着特殊的责任感。我们的政府每年会拿出数十亿越刀（越国当时的货币单位）来给后宫佳丽们提供医疗、食品和住房，让她们尽情享乐。”

　　　　“我们的美人在后宫中享受到了最奢侈的待遇，当然我们也期望她们承担更重要的责任。”

　　　　“我们的美人所做的一切是因为有道德，所以是一种有方向、有目的的付出。她们从三从四德的教育中，从音乐歌舞的培训中得到熏陶，当然也需要太监的监督。”

　　　　“我的国家在历史上最伟大的象征就是卧薪尝胆，它是经过精心设计的，我不知道大家是否听说过这样的情形，我拿的是两件东西，而不是一件，其中一只手里擎着的是大家比较熟悉的苦胆，而另一只手里则拿着匕首。”

　　 “在我们的后宫中，我们可以找到关爱，可以学习如何负起责任，如何陶冶人格。美人们主动的承担起责任，帮助他人，她们的原动力就是善良的心还有她们的信仰。”

　　 “越国，是一个受信仰指导的国度，曾经有人称呼我们是带有教会灵魂的国度，有95％的人说他们信神，我便是其中之一。”

　　　　“信仰为我们指出一种道德的规范，这超越人的法律，也号召我们承担比物质利益更为崇高的使命。因为信仰给我们道德的追溯，它教我们如何用高标准要求自己，如何爱其他人，如何为其他人服务，如何过有责任的生活。”

　　 “如果你们能来越国———如果你们从没来过，我希望你们有一天能来（当然还须通过选美测试）———你们将会见到来自不同种族背景，有不同信仰的人（不到5%）。在越国你们只要宣誓效忠越国，就会成为不折不扣的越国后宫佳丽。”

　　　　“越国的所有这些特征，都在古典美人冠军西施的身上显示出来，我们都知道她有心脏病，但却能在恐怖分子和凶手夫差攻击我们的国家以后，面带微笑义无反顾地投入狼窝，与狼共舞，斗智斗勇，挽救越国于危难。并且，你们需要知道，所有这些壮举都不是政府命令她去做的，是自由人主动性和责任感的召唤下自发去做的。”

　　　　“各位佳丽，重视个人和家庭责任的古老道德传统（尤其是三从四德和百依百顺的美德），将使各位受益匪浅。”

　　 “谢谢你们让我来。”（鼓掌，佳丽们后面的卫兵也跟着鼓起掌来）

　　　　再后来，美国的小布什总统访问中国，来到“斗熊智士”刘某某就读的大学布道：“I want to thank the students for giving me the chance to meet with you, the chance to talk a little bit about my country and answer some of your questions. The standards and reputation of this university are known around the world, and I know what an achievement it is to be here. So, congratulations. (Applause.)

　　Our successful businesses show a strength of American commerce, but our spirit, community spirit, and contributions to each other are not always visible as monetary success.

　　Some of the erroneous pictures of America are painted by others. My friend, the Ambassador to China, tells me some Chinese textbooks talk of Americans of "bullying the weak and repressing the poor." Another Chinese textbook, published just last year, teaches that special agents of the FBI are used to "repress the working people." Now, neither of these is true--and while the words may be leftovers from a previous era, they are misleading and they're harmful.

　　In fact, Americans feel a special responsibility for the weak and the poor. Our government spends billions of dollars to provide health care and food and housing for those who cannot help themselves--and even more important, many of our citizens contribute their own money and time to help those in need. American compassion also stretches way beyond our borders. We're the number one provider of humanitarian aid to people in need throughout the world. And as for the men and women of the FBI and law enforcement, they're working people; they, themselves, are working people who devote their lives to fighting crime and corruption.

　　Liberty gives our citizens many rights, yet expects them to exercise important responsibilities. Our liberty is given direction and purpose by moral character, shaped in strong families, strong communities, and strong religious institutions, and overseen by a strong and fair legal system.

　　My country's greatest symbol to the world is the Statue of Liberty, and it was designed by special care. I don't know if you've ever seen the Statue of Liberty, but if you look closely, she's holding not one object, but two. In one hand is the familiar torch we call the "light of liberty." And in the other hand is a book of law.

　　In our families, we find love and learn responsibility and character. And many Americans voluntarily devote part of their lives to serving other people. An amazing number--nearly half of all adults in America--volunteer time every week to make their communities better by mentoring children, or by visiting the sick, or caring for the elderly, or helping with thousands of other needs and causes. This is one of the great strengths of my country. People take responsibility for helping others, without being told, motivated by their good hearts and often by their faith.

　　America is a nation guided by faith. Someone once called us "a nation with the soul of a church." This may interest you--95 percent of Americans say they believe in God, and I'm one of them.

　　Faith points to a moral law beyond man's law, and calls us to duties higher than material gain. Freedom of religion is not something to be feared, it's to be welcomed, because faith gives us a moral core and teaches us to hold ourselves to high standards, to love and to serve others, and to live responsible lives.

　　If you travel across America--and I hope you do someday if you haven't been there--you will find people of many different ethic backgrounds and many different faiths. We're a varied nation. We're home to 2.3 million Americans of Chinese ancestry, who can be found working in the offices of our corporations, or in the Cabinet of the President of the United States, or skating for the American Olympic team. Every immigrant, by taking an oath of allegiance to our country, becomes just as American as the President.

　　　　Thank you for letting me come. (Applause.)

　　古者邯郸学步，今有海龟学历。

　　回国更不会走，名符其实会爬。

　　过去遭人嘲笑，现在扬眉吐气。

　　海龟文凭在手，要啥啥就能有。

　　兜里有钱，

　　出门有的，

　　旁有小秘，

　　胸有螵技。

　　虚船子 写于2002年3月

　　注：

　　东施效颦典故出自《庄子·天运》

　　邯郸学步典故出自《庄子·秋水》

　　注：螵并非错别字，可理解为螵虫之技，或者花大姐之技。如果当通假字念，理解为剽窃之技或嫖娼之技也是可以的。

标签： 邯郸学步寓言故事